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In his book Life at Death, Dr. Kenneth Ring analyzed the near-death experiences of 24 people who
attempted suicide. Among them, no one reported the tunnel phenomenon, or
saw a brilliant but comforting light, or encountered a presence, or was
temporarily reunited with loved ones who had died, or entered into a transcendent
world of heavenly beauty. Instead, the suicide-related near-death experience
tends to be truncated, aborted, damped down. It does begin with a feeling
of relief or peace and continues with a sense of bodily detachment to the
same degree as non-suicide-related near-death experiences. But it tends
to end, if it gets this far at all, with a feeling of confused drifting
in a dark or murky void a sort of "twilight zone". Dr.
Rings research strongly suggests that the suicide-related near-death
experience does not reach completion; instead, it tends simply to fade
out before the transcendent elements characteristic of non-suicide related
near-death experiences make their appearance.
One young man tried to kill himself by taking an assortment of pills
Librium, Demerol, Valium, Dilantin. As a result of this ingestion, he remained
unconscious for four days. He remembers finding himself in a "gray
area":
"The only thing that I can remember about this is just grayness. Like
I was in gray water or something. I couldnt really see anything.
I couldnt see myself there, either. It was just like my mind was
there. And no body."
While he was in this state, he felt good:
"Normally, Im a very anxious, a very nervous person a
lot of fears and things like that. And during this, all the fear was gone.
I had no fear whatsoever. Almost an adventurous feeling. Excitement." (Did you want to stay in that condition?) "Yeah. It was a very good feeling."
He also was aware of music:
"I also heard music different music." (Tell me what it was like.) "It was usually like classical music; I like classical music. It
wasnt exactly the music Ive heard, but it was along that line."
(Do you recall how the music made you feel?) "It made me relaxed. The fears went away when I listened to it. Again,
the feeling of hope, that theres something better somewhere else."
He also reported that everything, including the music, sounded "hollow
and metallic echoey" and that these acoustical sensations were
associated with the watery grayness. He felt the grayness going through
him, filling him and this felt good to him. After a while, he became aware
of a voice:
"I think [it was] a womans voice, but [pause] I didnt recognize the voice." (Do you recall now what she said to you?) "No. I just remember that it was a soothing voice. I kind of remember
that with the grayness her voice kind of calling, my moving toward
it." (This was a friendly voice, a reassuring voice in some way?) "Yeah." (... and you felt [drawn] to it?) "Yeah. Right. Like that was the place to be."
He tried to get to where the voice was:
"It seemed like I kept trying to get to where the voice was, but something
was holding me back. I know I wanted to be there; I knew once I was there everything would be fine.
I was sure of this. No question about it. But there was still like something
holding me back from getting there."
During his experience he had seen images of people he knew. These people
somehow seemed to represent the possibility of a good life; they seemed
to care. He described this as "like playing back a recording of my
life." The issue was joined:
"It felt like the womans was stronger. I wanted to get there
but there was just some part of me that wanted to [pause] go back with these images."
And resolved:
"The thing I remember most is a falling feeling. Like I was coming
down really fast and then hit. And then I woke up with a jolt."
And afterward:
"When I woke up, the first thing I thought was Oh, God. Thank you.
I made it, and I was extremely happy. [He had been severely depressed before his suicide attempt.] I was just sitting there thinking about it and I felt this I dont
know warmth filling my body. I was very happy, very excited, but
then [pause] it was more than contented it was rapture, I guess.
But I couldnt explain it to anybody at the time. It was just beyond
words."
These passages sum up the essential features of his experience. In the
course of his interview, he also indicated that although he never clearly
saw his physical body on the bed, he did have a sense of bodily detachment
and felt he had no weight at all he was just "pure mind."
Neither did he have any sense of time. When he momentarily returned to
body consciousness (before drifting back into the grayness), he found the
sensory world greatly enhanced the colors were clearer and more
vibrant. The only thing scary about his experience was his fear (which
was eventually vanquished) of returning to his body. His experience "in
the grayness" was decidedly pleasant and, judging from its immediate
aftereffect, very positive and powerful in its emotional impact.
This particular experience includes many features that are common with
non-suicide-attempt experiences: drifting through a vast space, feeling
good, hearing music and a comforting voice, hearing sounds magnified, seeing
a series of flashbacks of ones life, and so forth.
In Dr. Rings study, he found that no one who had attempted suicide
reported that it was predominately unpleasant. The only possible exception
is that a few people did describe some unsettling hallucinatory images,
but these appear to have been qualitatively different from the feeling-tone
of non-suicidal experiences. Certainly, no one felt that he was either
in or was on his way to hell. This is not to say that suicide attempts
never lead to unpleasant experiences, only that there is no strong evidence
for this proposition among the 24 suicide near-death experiences of Dr.
Rings study.
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